Take the Dive in 2025

I did it!!! It wasn't a thought or goal going into yesterday. It just happened. I did not turn on the TV for 24 hours. And, I liked it! The only time I was on social media was to share a fun snow day. And, to see everyone else pictures. The morning was non stop. I finished two pages of my new nature journal. While I was waiting for the paint to dry I finished a project I started 2 years ago. I bought some cut outs that look like Matisse. I figured I would use them for stencils in my art work. But, I also wanted to create a magical space. I do most of my painting and journaling on my dining room table. And, I cleared it off to put a new tablecloth on once a month. I am not liking that pattern of always having a projuct on that table. I want my table to be clear. So, I am going to use the table facing the window. I also put a bird feeder out my daughter gave me for Christmas. I am hoping to get some birds to watch and paint. But, not any yet. I finished another project which I will share later in the week. I had an appointment at the bank. The snow stopped just as I was walking out the door. When I came home I taught myself how to use the Imovie app on my computer. I tried myself. Then I watched a five minute you tube video. And, I was able to make my first movie and post it on you tube. Again I will share this later in the week. By then, it was time to go to a book signing at the Spring Lake Community House. Again, I hope to share more on this later. I really wanted to go to the RBAR to celebrate the great day. But, I started yawning, and decided to head home. The real test was to see how I would sleep. A solid eight hour sleep. Yes! Quote of the day: What is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" Mary Oliver Song of the day: My Days (from the Notebook) Ingrid Michelson

On the Last Day of Christmas

It's not a Partridge in a Pear Tree, but a dove in a heart. And, if you have been in the stores, it Valentine season already! Today I am home celebrating a snow day. Yesterday I took down my decorations. And, today I am getting my creative spaces organizing started. And, starting a Nature Journal for the month of January. I hope to switch to a You Tube vlog (video blog) to document my art journey this month. I feel like I am finally ready to tell my story and feel confident I am not wasting my time on my art. I really enjoyed the Advent and 12 days of Christmas season this year. Fear is my biggest obstacle. And, this past year after a diagnosis in the spring of melanoma. And, then my daughter's diagnosis of breast cancer. I realized something I feared the most, actually came true. My daughter did a brave social media post. Part of it was what I feel she can do. "Conquer Cancer with Creativity"! The doctors are actually going to do the curing. But, your brain can do a number on your confidence. And, creativity can help with pushing fear away. In a way you become your own hero. That's how I feel, anyway. For a long time in my life, I have been using words as affirmations. To stay positive, and help along the way. In my videos I will be showing some unique ways, I have added them to my creative space. And, I wear them. I was so happy to recieve two "little words project" bracelets from my son and future daughter in law. They say "inner peace" and "evolve". They join one I already have, which says "resilliance". My journal will also include words and paintings of the beautiful world around me. Most pictures will be from my imagination. And, January is a great time to slow down, rest and absorb some inner peace. Quote of the day: “The present moment is filled with joy and happiness. If you are attentive, you will see it.” – Thich Nhat Hanh Song of the day: Peace Taylor Swift

The Second to the last day of Christmas

I truly will look at Christmas this way forever. I always looked at Christmas as a day. I want to remember, especially this year. Not the actually day. But, the whole Advent season and the time between Christmas and the Epiphany. I couldn't write the last two days. It has been hard to process what each one of my children have been going through this holiday season. To give them each a positive spin on the last two weeks. I could not be any prouder. My daughter Kaylyn is facing a breast cancer diagnosis. The plan is in place. And, this battle should take about a year. It is in both breasts. My son Ian is engaged! We love our new addition to the family, Arielle. The plan is in place. But, no specifics are known yet. I usually write about feelings etc. And, I just can't go there right now. We all are just dealing with all of this as it comes. And, from experience, I have seen a special bond between twins. They feel each others feels, and end up being very supportive of each other. All in all, is we never know what is around the corner. With all of this, I know the stregnth and courage needed to get through all of this, at the same time, is within us all. I am not worried about dealing with things any more, while in isolation. I feel good and strong, and not weak and weepy. Today I am taking down my Christmas decorations. I have created a new magical workspace area facing a window. Kaylyn gave me a Christmas tree made of bird seeds. And, I put it in the tree facing the window. I would like to start nature journaling. With the snow expected tomorrow I want to have all my supplies at the ready. Quote of the day: “To appreciate the beauty of a snowflake, it is necessary to stand out in the cold.” – Aristotle. Song of the day: The Power of Prayer by Bruce Springsteen

Begin Again in 2025

I don't make resolutions. But, I do look for signs to say "this year is going to BE better then the last". The Last few years I have been easy on myself. I love my post from January of 2020!!! It was my own foreshadowing of a new chapter in my life. I had little signs. But, never in a million years did I think I would experience the losses of 2020. The most physically and mentally challenging was moving out of my home in 2021. The losses of 2020 were the loss of my mom and my job. I said in my post I just wanted to feel like I was floating on a river. And, whatever rocks (challenges) I would hit. I would deal with them head on. It has taken five years. But, I am feeling like I am back floating on the river, again. But, challenges are still coming at me. Mentally, I have to find ways of handling bad news, without having someone I live with to talk to. And, I have been hand writing to help with this. Yesterday, it was New Year's day. I was alright being alone. I did my daily blog post early. But, I started getting an anxious feeling. The thought of getting through this day really was getting to me. Then I saw the facebook post from a friend. She was going on a five mile walk with the American Littoral Society in Sandy Hook. I rushed to register and change in to comfortable and warm walking clothes. The weather said there would be high winds. And, this happened at the same time as our walk. I got there without a minute to spare. It was a great and challenging walk. I had never actually walked to the tip of Sandy Hook. The leader shared the information on the sand we were standing on, had traveled up from Manasquan Inlet. I thought that was a comforting thought for the day. Since, I still walk the sands of Manasquan. It also reminded me of a walk I did on the December Solstice after Ian's Charlie Brown Show at a Gallery in Cape May Court House. The hike wasn't as long. But, it was at the bottom of New Jersey in Marsh land. When you looked all around there was not another house, electric wire or any other sign of human life around. To be in these two opposite places in New Jersey in a week was extra special. I really love the spectrum of New Jersey. I also loved walking with a group of people. And, it put an exclamation point at the end of the year 2024. Because, YES it was a better year then the last. Quote of the day: “If you want something you’ve never had, you must be willing to do something you’ve never done.” —Thomas Jefferson Song of the day: New Beginnings Tracy Chapman Most of all, remember every day is a new beginning. Listen to the Robin who said "Begin Again"

BRAVE my word for 2025

On the sixth day of Christmas it is New Years Day. I usually choose a word for the year. This year it is Brave. I already love it. When I was with my friends last night, I heard a couple of times. "Well, that was brave." So, I am liking it so far. This past Monday I woke up and put my bathing suit on and went to an aquatics class. On my way out the door I unplugged my cable box and router. I have been going weekly to my class since the first week of November. It is free through Medicare......wooooohooooo!!!! So, the goal now is to go three times a week. The really cold days, it has been a challenge. One day soon after class I will go to AMC and see Wicked. I am waiting for a day or night, I am really bored. Then I went to Xfinity and dropped it all off ( I even remembered my remote). Then I went to Verizon to sign up for thier home internet. And, was told I had to call a number and they couldn't help me in the store. Long story short, I didn't leave. And, an hour later I had the router box in hand. The advertising is saying it is really easy, and just plug it in. Well, I plugged it in, and had a white light in 5 minutes and was told it was successful. OK, first my phone and that took 5 minutes. So far, so good. Then my printer was important in case I got an ebay order. That was a challenge, but getting an order should motivate me. Then my google nest took about an hour. Only, because I was just looking at the app, because I didn't have my laptop connected. Then it was on to lap top, so I could look up directions for app. Then the TV. And, my problem is all of this is easy, but, these smart TV's really overwhelm me. I was happy to have found the remote which went with the TV and by night fall I was watching netflix. I only did this because I was Brave. The amount of self doubt I had was off the charts. I was anxious, and my self talk was bad. And, then Anne Lamott's book: "Bird by Bird" comes into play. There were several times I just said to myself..."just take it one thing at a time". But, many times I wished for someone who knew how to do this to help me. So, now I am proud to say. "I did it!!!". So, enough with my word Be. Now I am looking forward to combining Be with brave. Because, it was REAL important in 2023 to just be. But, now I need some actions and changes to make 2025 productive. This means MORE travel and getting the book "The Butterfly Wrester" organized and written. Looking forward to being Brave and the year 2025. Happy New Year! Quote of the day: Hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up and try to do the right thing, the dawn will come. Anne Lamott Song of the day: Brave by Sara Bareillis

Unkind words are for the birds

Unkind Words Are For the Birds

I have been told To let time unfold Still my mind Can be so unkind Being kind to myself Brings good health &wealth Enough of the fight or flight Love yourself with all of your might Begin again said the robin Go your own way said the blue jay Give it your all said the cardinal Go with the flow Said the fish crow Enjoy your house said the tufted titmouse You will never find glory Telling yourself the same old story Tell your story Even if you feel it is ordinary

This was written in May. These were the birds I saw in one day around my home. I have the Cornell App. I love to identify the birds by their sounds. Birds I saw that day, not mentioned in this poem, are the house sparrow, gray catbird, European starling and the great blue heron. As the year 2024 is ending, I am reflecting on my writing. And, realizing that I am still not too kind to myself in my thoughts. And, this is my anxious side. So, I decided to ask a bird what they thought. And, actually they were very kind. So, this year I have to remember to be kinder to myself. Believe in myself. Trust myself. Be proud of myself. And, most of all love myself. I don't plan on changing myself into a new me. That is one clear thought that comes shining through. Quote of the day: A bird does not sing because he has an answer. He sings because he has a song. Joan Walsh Anglund I am noticing more and more how much I loved the little gift books of poems from Hallmark in sixties. This book is from the book "A Cup of Sunshine". Song of the day: Cardinal Kacie Musgraves

The Eighth Day of Christmas

I really think looking at Christmas like this is great. We still have a week to celebrate. And, appreciate any decorating we have done. Yesterday, I had a Hallmark movie watching marathon. I also started cutting out templates to make a bird for my tree. Today is the day I take back my cable equipment...oh my. It is something I really don't want to do. But, I won't know until I try. And, even if I do it for six months, I will save at least $1,200. I have a book I started when I went to Florida in November. I hope to finish it this week. I really found what I don't finish, makes me feel bad. Entering the year 2025 feels very hopeful. My bookshop I put on the backburner. I was keeping up with it each week. And, I just get bombarded with so many ads and emails each day. I just figured I would give it a rest. But, it is part of my entertainment budget for the new year. I have two books ready for the month of January to read. And, a lot of Authors are preselling books I am really interested in reading. You can visit my bookstore here. It was really fun to do each category, since I have pictures of meeting the authors. Part of my frustration was also printing QR codes to hand out. I have a new printer, and am really disappointed with not having what I was used to. But, yesterday I figured some things out, while printing the templates. Quote of the day: "Please, no matter how we advance technologically, please don't abandon the book. There is nothing in our material world more beautiful than the book." Patti Smith Happy 78th Birthday to Patty Smith today!!! Song of the day: Oh Holy Night Patti Smith